Our Words Build the Scene
Our words matter. They can be inclusive or exclusive. They can bring people in and make them feel supported or they can turn people away and make them feel unwelcome. What we say in our classrooms, how we talk to our kids, and what words we use really determine what kind of scene we are creating.
The reason I embraced the punk scene, the reason I felt at home at the shows, was because I was accepted and supported. It was a place that I thought embraced our differences and brought us together. A geeky kid who grew up in a small town and was never really good at sports felt like he belonged somewhere. I want my classroom and the school to feel the same way. I want my students to feel embraced and supported no matter who they are but I can smash all of those hopes with the language I use in my classroom.
We recently recorded an episode with Cait O’Connor that will be coming out later this month. During that discussion we talked about different things that we might not be aware of that separate our students from the culture in our classroom or others kids without us maybe being aware of it. In our conversation she mentioned the idea of diet culture in schools and it was something I never really thought about. You should go check out her blog about it over at teach better, Ditching Diet Culture at Schools. That conversation with Cait and others have really led me to examine what words I use in the classroom and how I bring kids into the scene instead of keeping them away from it.
I grew up with a younger sister, Stephanie, who was often looked at strangely in public. She has a cleft lip, hearing issues, speech issues, scoliosis, and has developmental delay issues as well. She was in and out of the hospital more times than I remember as a kid. Heart surgeries and facial surgeries being the most common reason. I remember getting so angry at kids and adults who would look at her sideways when we were in public. We didn’t attend the same school, she was bussed to a different district that had a better special education program, so I never witnessed her being othered first hand in the education setting but I know that it happened. I know that she was excluded by what other students said and probably what teachers said too. In general we have moved away from using words like the “R-word” in passing or to describe things. But when we were kids I know she was called that name in a purposely hurtful way and in ways when the person didn’t know better. I know that people were cruel and I know that people were ignorant about their use of the word and the hurt it caused kids like my sister. As a culture we have seen the error in our ways. We met a Stephanie or heard their families talk about how words like that are harmful and hurtful and excluded kids like my sister. Maybe you were an early adopter of kicking language like that or other terms out of your speech and out of your circles. But what words are you hanging on to that we should let go of?
What words are you using today that exclude your students? What words are you using to describe things in your classroom? Are we throwing around words like they don’t matter. Are we calling people crazy? Are we talking about their weight? Are we passing judgement on their appearance or mental health but “just joking around?” How much of that do you let slide in your own classroom and your own scene? How much of your language are you using because you don’t know better and what is keeping you from learning?
This year I started asking my students in a google survey at the beginning of the year about their pronouns, something I should have started earlier. I wanted to make sure I was welcoming them into our scene whenever I addressed them. I wanted to make sure I wasn’t ignoring who they were. It was a simple question inside a survey about what I can do to help them be successful in my economics class and what they think about the social studies classes they have had in the past, but I hope the simple questions and the words I use after it let them know I care and that they are welcome in the scene I am creating in my classroom.
I encourage you to examine how you use your words and find a way to grow an inclusive scene in your classrooms and schools with what you say. Our vocabulary should change to reflect our love and care for our students. We didn’t get into the classroom to turn kids away or keep them from our support and our words can do that if we aren’t aware or we don’t take the time to learn.
